Going Back To My Roots - New York Times Bestselling Author, J. Sterling

Going Back To My Roots

Most of you probably don't know that before I started writing books, I was a blogger. I was one of the first "mommy bloggers" before we got saddled with that title. And even though the majority of my blogs weren't really even about being a mom, I was still considered a mommy blogger because I had a kid.

I was also one of the only bloggers who never wanted to write a book. LOL No really, it's true. While all the other bloggers were talking about writing books, getting book deals, defining writing outside of the blog as one of their biggest aspirations... I always looked around and thought "I'm happy writing my blog posts! I don't want to write a book. Y'all are weirdos!"

Now look at me.

But here's the thing... once I decided to start writing novels and making that my career, I immediately let go of blogging. It was the first thing I shut down, turned off, and stopped giving any attention to. Which is kind of weird now that I think about it-  because blogging IS writing and why would I stop doing what I so clearly love to do?

I suppose looking back I assumed that blogging would get in the way of the stories I wanted to tell. I'm sure I believed that I only had so much creativity inside my brain and if one of the outlets had to go, it would be the blog. I was also in a really difficult time in my life back then, so I'm sure I also felt tapped out and at the end of my rope. But more on that later....

You might be asking what my point is....  and well, here it is.... I miss it. I miss blogging because it connected me to other people. It connected us to each other. Blogging was my personal outlet where I talked about all the things that plagued me. And so much of the time, they were the things that plagued you as well. We bonded. We emailed. We talked to one another in the comments. We supported each other.

Blogging created connections.
And I want that back.

So, I've decided to start blogging again. But i'm doing it here, on my author blog because I want to get to know you all. And I want you to know me. I realize that that isn't typical author behavior, but I've never really been one for doing things the way you're supposed too. I'm not afraid to talk about personal things. I'm not scared to bare my heart and soul to you.

I'm still going to talk about my books, what I'm working on, the people and things that inspired them, but we'll also talk about life-  and love-  being mom's and anything else that comes up!  I'm open to questions, personal and business ones. Anything you want to talk about just post it in the comments!

First things first though ... Introductions:
Hi! I'm Jenn! I'm a single mom, My son's name is Blake. He's 18. He's a baseball player and he's awesome. I'm divorced. I want to believe in the things I write about in my books, but it's really hard sometimes. I want to say i'm a hopeless romantic, but I don't think I am. It was recently pointed out to me that I allow my mind to talk me out of ANYTHING I don't think is good for my heart. I never realized that about myself before, but it's so true. All of my stories are based on real life and things that I've been through, experienced or witnessed. I write contemporary romance novels and I really, really hope that you read them.

Now it's your turn!  Tell me a little about yourself in the comments and if there's anything we should address or talk about here... let me know!  :)

Thanks for stopping by. I appreciate you,
Jenn

31 comments:

  1. Franci Neill5:01 PM

    OOOHHH I get to be the first commenter!! YAY!!! Let's see, I'm Franci I'm West Coaster living outside of Philly, I love the Denver Broncos, I'm a blogger and LOVE reading, obviously. I have a Wauzer who basically runs my life. Oh and my fake boobs feel real LOL

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    1. Franci has great boobs! LOL Glad you're here! :)

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  2. Hello my love!!! I'm Rach from Louisiana. I'm a Marine Corps wife and stay at home mom to 4 munchkins ages 9, 7, 5, & 2. I'm a beachbody coach, I love running, fitness/nutrition, wine, and most importantly READING!!

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    1. Hi Rach! Thanks for coming by and participating! YAY! :)

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  3. I think this is the best idea! I am Barb. I never thought I would write a book either. I was known for saying,'if it's a good book they will make it into a movie' because that was all the time I was willing to gove up. I am a hairstylist and had shared my own story with clients over the years to help them through situations. They always told me it would make a great book. One day one of my coworkers asked me why I hadn't written it yet. By then I had found my love for books so I answered like this. "I love to eat but I am no chef." Later that day I opened an app on my phone called notepad and began. Once I started I couldn't stop. I found love for something I didn't ever thnk was possible. What that cost me? My marriage.
    After 19 years with him, supporting everything he ever wanted to do he turned his back on me when I found my own passion. If I brought it up he rolled his eyes or walked away from me. I refused to let it get me down and told myself I didn't need his support. I was doing this for me.
    When he told me I had changed and I wasn't the girl he fell in love with it broke my heart. My world crumbled at my feet. My two children were going to be one of the statistics. I couldn't stop throwing up.
    But then I realized something. I am not a victim. I deserve better than to beg someone to love me. My children deserved better than to grow up in a home where their parents don't give them a example of what to strive for.
    I bought my own home 3 months ago and my kids are doing great. My writing, well it isn't going so good. I wish I could channel my emotions but my head is all over the place. So for now I just try to stay positive and smile as much as I can.
    I love you Jen and you've got this. Whatever you chose to do, you shine.

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    1. I am so proud of not only your outlook, but in all you've accomplished in such a short amount of time. You DO deserve better- none of us should dumb ourselves down, or stifle our passions to make someone else comfortable. God, that makes me sick to even write, it sounds so wrong, so against our very soul's calling and desires. You are giving your kids an inspiring example and strength to look up to. Proud of you. So very proud. HUGS

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    2. We will always have each others back. Strength in women should always be supported. This community isn't always the easiest to be in but when we find people like each other we know we found our calling for sure. I love you to the moon woman!

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  4. Hi! I'm Mary from Mississippi. I have been married to my college sweetheart for 30 years. We have three grown children (28, 28, 24). I am a high school English teacher and soccer coach. I don't have much time for doing my own writing as I am too busy teaching it and reading what my students write. I love all things related to sports. My husband and I enjoy traveling. My twin daughters both live in Florida, one in Jacksonville and one in Destin...my vacation destinations. I love the beach! Reading is my passion! I, of course, love all things Jenn has written.

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    1. Hi Mary! Thank you so much for reading my books and for coming to the blog! I'm super excited. :)

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  5. Hi, I'm Renata, I live in Belo Horizonte, Brazil. I'm a lawyer and blogger (it's crazy to manage everything). I love her novels and I look forward to the next releases. I am completely addicted to books, (kkkkk) I have nowhere else to go and unfortunately I can not abandon my babies. I love caipirinha and a good wine, the combination with a good books is perfect. (Hopefully to understand my lousy English)



    Oi, Sou a Renata, moro em Belo Horizonte no Brasil. Sou advogada e blogueira (é uma loucura administrar tudo). Amo os seus romances e estou ansiosa pelos próximos lançamentos. Sou completamente viciada em livros, (kkkkk) não tenho onde mais colocar e infelizmente não consigo abandonar meus bebes. Amo caipirinha e um bom vinho, a combinação com um bom livros é perfeita . (espero que de para entender meu péssimo inglês)

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    1. i LOVED belo, Renata! Such a cool place! I'm glad you're here! :)

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  6. Hi I am Katie. I was born when my mother was 14 years old. She married my 16 year old father. My father became an addict. I was raised by an addict. I watched what my mother went through. What my sister and I lived through and I said never. Never never ever. I wouldn't date a guy more than 3 month. I had the 3 month rule because that is when you usually have your first first. It's normal... but the moment a guy raised his voice in my direction I was done. Done. So I was perfectly content with being single. I enjoyed it. I liked my own space and never having to answer to anyone, cook for anyone, be on my best behavior for anyone. And I never wanted to bring kids into this world. I love kids. Adore them. Little people are my soulmates. But I didn't want to be responsible for protecting them from the bad and I assumed all households were bad or would turn bad. So moved out when I was 16. Worked at night and finished my last 2 years of high school. Worked 4 jobs and got myself through college. Lived in an awesome teeny tiny apartment in Uptown Charlotte and I was content. At 32 years old I met Miller. He didn't make me nervous. He didn't raise his voice. He was patient and he was kind and before I realized it he had been around 6 months. My boss brought it it my attention. See I work in a corporate world. It was always a delimma finding a man who fit into my business life who could go to corporate functions and business dinners and one I could also take home to my family to deal with the addiction and squalor and childhood trauma. Miller did both without batting an eye and without making me feel ashamed. Looking at life through my grown up eyes I can see my mother for the 14 year old baby she was and realize she just didn't have the ability to protect us. When you are little momma is just momma you don't see age. I have been able to forgive her and I would like nothing more than the opportunity to become a mother. I know that i will not repeat the past. I trust my husband to be a good father. And my stupid body keeps letting me down. After all that my body can not do it's job. It hurts. And it hurts to not be able to give that to Miller. I want to be angry. I want to wallow in self pity but I have a beautiful life now. Everything I never thought possible. How petty of me to feel sorry for myself and be miserable because of one thing I can't have. So I have reached acceptance. You don't always get to have it all but if you appreciate what you do get then life can be beautiful. Not sure you wanted all that spilled all over your blog post but that's me laying it all bear. I adore you.

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    1. Katie, I adore you. You are a pillar of personal strength and integrity. And I think it's OKAY to want to be angry or wallow in self pity.... it's not petty. It's NOT petty to want our bodies to do what they're supposed to. You're a woman and we're raised consciously, or subconsciously, to be mother's. We're raised to "get married, have kids, buy a house, etc etc".... Please don't think that you don't have the right to be sad that your body is betraying you. You have every right to feel the way you feel. You have every right to be hurt. You are not alone.
      You could adopt? You and Miller would make beautiful parents and any child (ren) would be lucky to have you. You can adopt me? LOL You are such a good person and I'm so grateful to have you and Miller in my life.

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  7. Amber6:01 PM

    Hi Jenn! I am Amber, 32 year old teacher and mom of 2. I love your books and how real and honest you are. I believe in true love and soulmates and all that stuff too. I also believe that sometimes what you think is your fairytale is actually your plot twist. :) I fell in love in college, got married, five years later I was pregnant and thinking how perfect my life was turning out... only problem was that he was having an affair with one of his high school students. It turns out, my happily ever after lived less than a mile down the road. We met, got married, had a sweet baby girl, and he even adopted my son. I'm so thankful for my plot twist, because it put me where I am right now. I'm glad you are blogging; I will absolutely be reading. :)

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    1. Amber.. i LOVE that! A plot twist... LOVE IT! :) Thank you for being here. I'm so happy to have you.

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  8. Hey girl hheeeyyy! I've been following you as an author for years and am so glad to get to know you a little more! My name's Jessie (who'da guessed it) and I'm married with 2.5 kids. The hubs and I just got over the 7 year itch (he swears it's 7 year bitch...who am I to tell the man differently). With as much of an OCD grammar nazi as I am, he swears I should write a book. I'll never say never, just don't think I have the imagination to write books for a living. I've just recently started back to college to become a Spanish teacher (although I may want to broaden my horizons and go for translation. Who knows. I know you're going to (or already are) being bombarded about that guy from down south but I would prefer to hear about Brazil as a country. I've always been interested in South American culture.

    Thanks for taking the time to listen!
    KThxBye!

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    1. Jessie! LOL There will be talk about Mr. Brazil on here. I will talk about the country as well, but you KNOW that makes me think of him... and I want to share my heartache. It helps me heal.
      Translation would be amazing! We are always looking for that!!! ANd you could be an editor??? Ever think of that? :) i'm glad you're here!

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    2. I haven't thought of editing but will definitely keep the idea afloat! Right now I went into teaching bc kids/breaks/life but can't imagine being a teacher for life. Thanks for the idea! I agree talking helps heal, just didn't want the pressure to be all on him (we like you, too!). Can't wait to see what's next for ya and I'm glad you're here as well!

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  9. Sarah Loopy Green8:12 PM

    Hello.
    So pleased for you Jenn. You deserve to do what makes you happy. I'm Sarah Loopy Green, I'm from the UK and I get to meet you in November. Really excited about that. I'm a mother of two beautiful girls, aged 14 and 10, scary times, as my youngest moves up to secondary school this September. Keep smiling beautiful x

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    1. Hi Sarah! I can't wait to come back to England and meet you in November... I am SO looking forward to it! :)

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  10. Hi Jenn, this is such a cool idea! My name is Carol and I live in the UK where the proper job as a facilities manager for a gloabl software company does nothing other than pay the bills and eat into the time I would rather spend doing the one thing I love which is reading , oh and blogging of course. I have two grown up kids and two beautiful granddaughters. My husband and I meet on a night out and had a second date three days later, after a week he had all but moved in, people thought we were mad but we celebrate out 25th wedidng anniversary on the 4th of July this year so we obviousy got something right! I knew from the get go that he was the guy for me and I was right because he has finally got to grips with the fact ...that he can NEVER speak to me while I have a book in my hand, mind you it does mean he has full control of the TV! I blog every single day on my website, facebook and just about everywhere else, it s almost therapy and for the last 3 years I think it is all that has kept me sane. I am never without my kindle, I buy my handbags with my kindle in mind, if it dont fit then its a non starter, no matter how pretty and I even take my laptop on vacation with me. I read a seriously crazy amount, I think I average a book a day and reguarly leave home early each morning to get to work, were I can then sit and read in peace in my car before starting the day. I have the utmost admiration for your work and I had no idea that you were a blogger first, I would love to take that leap, I tried and got about 17k words but it has been sitting untouched on my laptop for 2 years now and I think I have accepted that it will never get finished.
    Thanks for the opportunity to get in touch

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    1. Hi Carol!!! :) i LOVE your love story! I was totally a blogger first- I'll probably talk more about that on here. Becoming a fiction writer truly wasn't intentional, but it makes so much sense! And you can do it... 17k words isn't nothing!

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  11. Hi
    I am Monique and I live in a remote part of Western Australia. I have 3 boys Stuart (9), Nicholas (7) and Cooper (4.5). I am a stay at home mum and studying a double major in Accounting and finance in all my spare time.

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    1. Cute that you have "spare" time... we know you don't. LOL Thank you for stopping by! I'm really glad you're here!

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  12. Hi, Jenn!!
    I'm Barbara, I'm 16 and I live in Rio (Brazil).
    If I could only do one thing for the rest of my life it probably would be read. I love words and I love love stories.
    I hope one day I get to write my own books and have people reading them.
    Mom says I would be a great lawyer but my heart is in another place (maybe Tourism, Spychology or Philosopy). I dream on moving to the U.S. since I was little and now that I'm ending school (I start the last year of high school next monday) I'm so nervous because I don't know what should I do. I spend most of my days and nights crying because I'm so afraid of let my mom and my stepfather down but I'm also so afraid of not following my dreams now and when I'm older I get completely frustrated.
    I'm so excited to read your blog (just as I'm always excited to read your books)! You rock, Jenn! You're one of the few people that I have met that was as pretty on the inside as on the outside.

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    1. BARBARA!!!!!!!!!! hi. lol Thank you for your kind words and I feel so badly for the stress you're enduring. It seems to be a common theme in Brazil that i've noticed- the taking care of your family and the desire to truly not let them down. That has to be really hard. I think the minute we start living for everyone else and making our choices that go against what truly calls to us.... everything falls apart. What we're meant to do will eventually YELL at us until we do it- maybe you could talk to your mom about your heart and your dreams? maybe she would be more supportive than you think? I truly don't know- but I would like to believe that she wouldn't want you to be unhappy. Hang in there. We'll talk about this more!

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  13. HI JENN
    YEAH !!! You are back to blogging. i have so missed your wit and stories of your life. so i am nancy long time blog reader and one of your first fans when you started writing books. i have read all but the newest one ( sorry a bit back logged on books but i working on it.) i am a married book worm with 2 dogs and 5 cats and a conure living in Pa.

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    1. NANCY!!!! YAY!!!! I hope my blogger wit comes back- It's been so long since i've written like that, you know?! LOL I'm so glad you followed me over... so few did. I feel like you should win an award. lol

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  14. Hi Jenn! Well I am a Mommy Blogger I suppose too. I don't ever write about being a Mom, but it's part of me, so I fall into that category too. I blog mostly about books and do book reviews, and am a beta reader for a few authors too, but I also toss in some of my photography from time to time too. I have been taking pictures since I was 12 and consider myself a semi professional photographer. I am originally from Oklahoma, but moved to Maryland nearly ten years ago when my husband got a job working for the Navy. I have a three year daughter who is going on ten and I love to read. We met in DC aim 2014 at a signing and I met you again last year in Charlotte. I first fell in love with your books just after DC, as I'd never been introduced to your writing til then. I will be an author assistant at the Bluegrass event in April so I'll get to see you and hang out again. I'm so excited to meet you again, for the third time.

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    1. Oh and you wrote the sweetest words in my books in Charlotte about our "Love story" about how I found your books 😍

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    2. And I can't wait to read your blogging! 😊

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