I hate Valentine's Day! I think. - New York Times Bestselling Author, J. Sterling

I hate Valentine's Day! I think.

HA!

For as long as I can remember, I've always claimed to hate Valentine's Day. It's stupid. It's cheesy. It's dumb- I would say to anyone who listened.

But I think the truth is that I don't hate it. At all. It's just that I've either been single whenever the day rolled around, or I've always been disappointed. And there's nothing worse than a shitty valentine's day when you have a damn valentine. You know?  (Yes. there's plenty worse. I know that. Just go with me here).  So yeah, you have a valentine, you have have a husband, a wife, a boyfriend, a girlfriend, whatever... you have someone in your life... and with that comes expectations, whether you intend to have them or not.  You expect that your Valentine's day will be the stuff of dreams... the kind of things people like me write about in our books. Or you at least expect flowers. Or candy. Or a romantic dinner somewhere. Or something! God, ANYTHING!

And then it doesn't happen. For whatever reason. It's not romantic. You don't get roses. You don't go out to dinner. You don't feel special on this hallmark holiday. And even if your brain gets it, rationalizes it, knows this day means "nothing"... your heart doesn't. A part of you still wants that romance. You want to feel special. You want to feel thought about. And even though you know that everything is three times more expensive on this day than on any other..... you want to be worth the extra money. I know I do. I absolutely do. One of the least romantic things someone can do is make you feel like you weren't worth it. And you know what? I'm tired of that. I'm tired of the excuses for why I wasn't worth shopping for, buying something for, for being thought of, etc.  When guys insist that it's a bullshit holiday that's made up, it's just their way of getting out of getting you something.

I want more than that.
I deserve more than that.
And I sure as shit give more than that.

So yeah. I don't hate this holiday at all. I think I've always pretended to hate it so that I wouldn't feel so disappointed when it didn't live up to my expectations. And trust me, it never did. You get tired of being let down all the time. I do. I have. I'm over it. I'm starting to realize that I've lacked A LOT when it comes to the real life romance and passion department. I have a lot to learn. But you know what?  I'm excited about what's to come. Because I'm not settling anymore.

So tell me... do you love or hate, or just pretend to hate, this holiday?  Talk to me in the comments!  :)


9 comments:

  1. Wow...it's like you're in my head! I've never "hated" V-Day but I make sure to keep my expectations really low so that when my husband does NOTHING to acknowledge the day, our love, me in general, I don't feel worse. I'm not sure when I started feeling this way but it's been far too long. I want to be worth it too! Happy Valentine's Day, Jenn!

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    1. I think so many of us feel the same way about it. Disappointment is a real thing... it lives and breathes. Love you Tracy!

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  2. Love this. I used to be one of those that said I hated Valentine's Day, because like you, I always seemed to be alone on that day. Then I met my husband and guess what day we started dating......yep, Valentine's Day. So this year we are celebrating 17 years of being together but the even better part of my most recent Valentine's Days are that our son was born that day. So regardless, I always have my baby to give me love and I told him you will always, always be my Valentine's Day. Happy Valentine's Day!!!

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    1. I want it to be something I look forward too instead of something I make fun of out of deflection. You know? I'm so glad you have a valentine (or 2)! :)

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  3. I think all woman are let down on Valentine's Day and Anniversaries and heck even. Hristmas. We all want the Hallmark Channel Movie grand gestures. I have a fabulous husband but he just doesn't know what to do to make big occasions feel special. He tries. He just doesn't get it and there have been times I cried myself to sleep over being let down. And my husband is *fabulous*. So I know it is just built up so much in our minds that we let ourselves down. You are so not alone in this. That being said you should keep looking for that something special and you should know that you deserve the grand gestures and romance. Most importantly you deserved to be loved beyond words and to have that person. The one who loves you, supports you, puts your happiness above all else, the one who doesn't even have dinner until he knows what you are doing. Your one. He is out there and you will find him. Because you are a kickass person and he would be so lucky. I love you.

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    1. Yup. We have big expectations for our LOVE lives. I love and adore you.

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  4. I don't hate it, I just think it is a holiday to set people up for disappointment. I would rather be surprised with flowers or gifts and I love yous and your worth it's in July or another day in the year than on Valentines Day when people feel obligated to express it! I go buy a fancy dinner on February 15th to celebrate my Anti Valentines Day!! So don't get me wrong I'm all for hearts and flowers just not in Feb. 14th!!

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    1. I want flowers ALL THE DAMN TIME. LOLOLOLOL :)

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  5. I don't like to celebrate it. If you can't love me all year...then hit the road jack!

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